At my wits end

[lady zed]

This is a copy of my post tongiht on facebook. I'm am abslutely at the end of my tether. My legs aree like jelly and I do not know how much more of this I can take.





"Ok, this is absolutely last chance saloon. If anyone on my friends list is still friends with my rabid ex could you please knock some sense into him. I am SICK of him turning up here, shouting the odds, threatening to get all 'his pals' t have a word with whoever I'm seeing, he threatened to stab him in the throat in front of the children, he'll find him etc and he'll come to my house whenever he likes to see his kids as it's his right. His excuse for this disgusting behaviour is that he has a right to know who I'm seeing, who I've walked into the kids life. Like I'm some kind of unfit mother who can't make that judgement call for herself. Like I would introduce my children to anyone who would be detrimental to them. I have absolutely had enough. I'm being left with little choice, little options, he even told me a few weeks ago I'd end up 'like her up the mearns' (the woman who was murdered by her ex). This is domestic abuse, plain and simple, and the so called friends who are encouraging him are no NAUGHTY WORD-NAUGHTY WORD-NAUGHTY WORD-NAUGHTY WORD-NAUGHTY WORD-NAUGHTY WORD- better!!!!!!! He has NO RIGHT to know what's going on in my personal life, who I#'m seeing and when, it's NONE OF HIS BUSINESS. For anyone who's unsure, the reason we separated was because I caught him cheating AGAIN! Now, he's denying, they were only friends, even going back 10 years to his first affair, they were only friends and he only moved in with her cause he had nowhere else to go!!!!! He really is playing the victim and I'm in the big bad. I gave him NO INDICATION I would ever take him back but because he decided he wanted to get back with me and then found out I'd met someone, I'm the slut, I'm the tart. I have had it!!!!!!!!!!!!! I just want to move on with my life but I feel like there is absolutely no esape from him, he'll never let me go."

[barney bear]

Ring the police and tell them he had threatened to kill you. They will have to act because of all the victims there have been the last few years. What sort of man says things like that to the mother of his children

Don't give him a chance to do something stupid, you deserve to have a life without fear of this NAUGHTY WORD-NAUGHTY WORD-NAUGHTY WORD-NAUGHTY WORD- ruining it forever.

[Jay]

Don't really know what to say Anna but you are the better person.
An Injunction is a possibility but it could make matters worse.
I would call your local police force and let them look at the evidence but request that they note it down (and get the incident number) without notifying your ex, to build up a profile of potential future risk. You can then refer back to the incident number and hopefully work things out so the police come in force.

Take care, which ever way you do it x

[Lancpudn]

That's a terrible ordeal to have to go through Anna, especially in front of your children, The man is a control freak and you really need to speak to the authorities about it.

[FLYER]

Number one keep all doors and windows locked .

If he has a key change locks .

You MUST inform your local police whats happened .

You must take legal advice .

That apart if he turns up phone the cops AT ONCE .

Stay safe Anna.

[mininuts]

Blimey Anna, don't really know what to say other than what's already been said.
You have to contact the police though, especially with the threats that have been made!
Wish I could help more.
Be safe.

[Gren 24]

Anna,that ex of yours is the lowest form of life there is. You deserve better than be treated this way.

I would do what Jay said ( I would call your local police force and let them look at the evidence but request that they note it down (and get the incident number) without notifying your ex, to build up a profile of potential future risk. You can then refer back to the incident number and hopefully work things out so the police come in force.)

I would do what a Lady I know did and carried a small voice recorder on her all the time and when he came round she turned, he did not know because it was in her pocket.

Just take care of yourself and those children you love.

Les

[andymc]

As others have said Anna, it's very important that you inform the police about this without delay, and emphasise the fact that he has made at least one threat to your life as well as that of your partner.

You are absolutely right - this is domestic abuse. Also, speak to Women's Aid - they should provide you with advice and information about how to deal with him (including any possible non-molestation order - I'm not sure what the specific legal term is in Scotland), how to report him to the police in such as way as to make sure they take you very seriously and handle your case with the urgency it merits.

Regardless of the whys & wherefores, as a responsible adult you have made the decision that you no longer wish to be involved with this man. That is your absolute right - you don't have to justify or explain the fact. There's no need to consider what labels either he or anyone else might use to describe you. That's simply more abuse, of the verbal/psychological variety.

If he turns up again and refuses to leave or makes similar threats, don't just say you'll call the police - do it, immediately, using the 999 emergency number. Tell them that you fear for your safety. I'm not being melodramatic or exaggerating when I say that you should do everything in your power to avoid becoming another unhappy statistic.

[FLYER]

Originally Posted by andymc

As others have said Anna, it's very important that you inform the police about this without delay, and emphasise the fact that he has made at least one threat to your life as well as that of your partner.

You are absolutely right - this is domestic abuse. Also, speak to Women's Aid - they should provide you with advice and information about how to deal with him (including any possible non-molestation order - I'm not sure what the specific legal term is in Scotland), how to report him to the police in such as way as to make sure they take you very seriously and handle your case with the urgency it merits.

Regardless of the whys & wherefores, as a responsible adult you have made the decision that you no longer wish to be involved with this man. That is your absolute right - you don't have to justify or explain the fact. There's no need to consider what labels either he or anyone else might use to describe you. That's simply more abuse, of the verbal/psychological variety.

If he turns up again and refuses to leave or makes similar threats, don't just say you'll call the police - do it, immediately, using the 999 emergency number. Tell them that you fear for your safety. I'm not being melodramatic or exaggerating when I say that you should do everything in your power to avoid becoming another unhappy statistic.

excellent advice .

[barney bear]

Originally Posted by andymc

As others have said Anna, it's very important that you inform the police about this without delay, and emphasise the fact that he has made at least one threat to your life as well as that of your partner.

You are absolutely right - this is domestic abuse. Also, speak to Women's Aid - they should provide you with advice and information about how to deal with him (including any possible non-molestation order - I'm not sure what the specific legal term is in Scotland), how to report him to the police in such as way as to make sure they take you very seriously and handle your case with the urgency it merits.

Regardless of the whys & wherefores, as a responsible adult you have made the decision that you no longer wish to be involved with this man. That is your absolute right - you don't have to justify or explain the fact. There's no need to consider what labels either he or anyone else might use to describe you. That's simply more abuse, of the verbal/psychological variety.

If he turns up again and refuses to leave or makes similar threats, don't just say you'll call the police - do it, immediately, using the 999 emergency number. Tell them that you fear for your safety. I'm not being melodramatic or exaggerating when I say that you should do everything in your power to avoid becoming another unhappy statistic.

There speaks a wise man