The Chill Out Zone - Page 594

coolcat · 15th December 2012, 15:43

Quote:

Originally Posted by stevestrat

We are so devoted to our dogs that we're concerned about little Abby, she hasn't been right since being clipped. We suspect that leaving her at the groomers has traumatised her. Poor wee thing has been through a lot, she was my parent's dog, my father vanished from her life followed all too quickly by my mother, she was actually in the room while Paramedics worked on my mother. You don't know what effect that had on her wee mind. She latched onto me then I left her with "bad people" she didn't know who cut her hair.

Give her lots of cuddles and attention, that should win her round.
She probably had thoughts of you leaving and not returning and is suffering a bit of anxiety.

COLVERT · 15th December 2012, 16:00

For all you worried gents this might give you a laff.---------------

A bloke starts his new job at the zoo and is given three tasks.

First is to clear the exotic fish pool of weeds.

As he does this a huge fish jumps out and bites him. To show who is boss, he beats it to death with a spade.

Realizing his employer won't be best pleased he disposes of the fish by feeding it to the lions, as lions will eat anything.

Moving on to the second job of clearing out the Chimp house, he is attacked by the chimps that pelt him with coconuts.

He swipes at two chimps with a spade killing them both. What can he do?

Feed them to the lions, he says to himself, because lions eat anything...

He hurls the corpses into the lion enclosure.

He moves on to the last job which is to collect honey from the South American Bees.

As soon as he starts he is attacked by the bees. He grabs the spade and smashes the bees to a pulp.

By now he knows what to do and shovels them into the lions cage because lions eat anything.

Later that day a new lion arrives at the zoo.. He wanders up to another lion and says "What's the food like here?"

The lions say: "Absolutely brilliant, today we had Fish and Chimps with Mushy Bees.

Colv.

coolcat · 15th December 2012, 16:04

Very Funny :xmas-smiley-029:
Where was the gravy?
You can't have Fish, chimps and mushy bee's without gravy

reworht · 15th December 2012, 17:01

Well - its Saturday night - boys' night out, snooker, cider and a totally sophisticated soirée (yeah, right!) at the Club. Should just make it home by midnight, which means I shouldn't turn back into a frog.
Strange night last night - once I'd seen the horrific news from the USA - I went round to my son's house to give my grandkids a big hug - hence I missed band practise.
Whatever you're doing, do it well and remember the old adage - if you're not in bed by midnight, you may as well give up and go home :xmas-smiley-029:

Sunday breakfast - I should make it into the kitchen by about 9.15 if you can all wait 'til then

coolcat · 15th December 2012, 18:54

Quote:

Originally Posted by reworht

Well - its Saturday night - boys' night out, snooker, cider and a totally sophisticated soirée (yeah, right!) at the Club. Should just make it home by midnight, which means I shouldn't turn back into a frog.
Strange night last night - once I'd seen the horrific news from the USA - I went round to my son's house to give my grandkids a big hug - hence I missed band practise.
Whatever you're doing, do it well and remember the old adage - if you're not in bed by midnight, you may as well give up and go home :xmas-smiley-029:

Sunday breakfast - I should make it into the kitchen by about 9.15 if you can all wait 'til then

Have a great evening Rod,
Don't worry, band practice will only be when all band members and management are present and correct:xmas-smiley-029:

coolcat · 15th December 2012, 21:26

Peaceful on here tonight, what with Rod out partying and all that!
I'm off to the land of nod myself so catch you all in the morning for breakfast:xmas-smiley-029:

Leyland Worldmaster · 15th December 2012, 21:55

Nite Jeff it has been quiet here! How's your day been? I didnt gey back from.shopping until half eight; went around most of London looking for an Air album; their latest one... They're returning to form. I've all their albums and its most interesting to chart their progress! It's the first band I really followed!

coolcat · 15th December 2012, 22:00

Quote:

Originally Posted by leopard680

Nite Jeff it has been quiet here! How's your day been? I didnt gey back from.shopping until half eight; went around most of London looking for an Air album; their latest one... They're returning to form. I've all their albums and its most interesting to chart their progress! It's the first band I really followed!

Haven't quite got there yet, still lurking on here just about with one eye open:xmas-smiley-029:

coolcat · 15th December 2012, 22:02

Forgot to tell you, no update on cats as we're going tomorrow now instead

coolcat · 15th December 2012, 22:03

I've heard of the band Air supply but not Air, I'm guessing they're good as you have all their albums!

15th December 2012, 16:04	#5933
coolcat This is my second home Audi Q3 TDI S-Line Quattro Join Date: Jul 2007 Location: Clacton On Sea/On the boat somewhere Posts: 51,335 Thanks: 9,890 Thanked 12,235 Times in 8,232 Posts	Very Funny :xmas-smiley-029: Where was the gravy? You can't have Fish, chimps and mushy bee's without gravy __________________ Jeff.

15th December 2012, 17:01	#5934
reworht This is my second home Honda HR-V 1.6 i-DTEC SE Navi 5dr Diesel Hatchback Join Date: Apr 2012 Location: North Yorks Moors Posts: 14,446 Thanks: 782 Thanked 2,156 Times in 1,497 Posts	Well - its Saturday night - boys' night out, snooker, cider and a totally sophisticated soirée (yeah, right!) at the Club. Should just make it home by midnight, which means I shouldn't turn back into a frog. Strange night last night - once I'd seen the horrific news from the USA - I went round to my son's house to give my grandkids a big hug - hence I missed band practise. Whatever you're doing, do it well and remember the old adage - if you're not in bed by midnight, you may as well give up and go home :xmas-smiley-029: Sunday breakfast - I should make it into the kitchen by about 9.15 if you can all wait 'til then __________________ [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC] Rodney - you plonker! ... but more commonly known as Rod !

15th December 2012, 21:26	#5936
coolcat This is my second home Audi Q3 TDI S-Line Quattro Join Date: Jul 2007 Location: Clacton On Sea/On the boat somewhere Posts: 51,335 Thanks: 9,890 Thanked 12,235 Times in 8,232 Posts	Peaceful on here tonight, what with Rod out partying and all that! I'm off to the land of nod myself so catch you all in the morning for breakfast:xmas-smiley-029: __________________ Jeff.

15th December 2012, 21:55	#5937
Leyland Worldmaster This is my second home Audi A2 1.4TDI Join Date: Aug 2010 Location: Avec the Penguins! Posts: 11,469 Thanks: 3,355 Thanked 1,622 Times in 1,057 Posts	Nite Jeff it has been quiet here! How's your day been? I didnt gey back from.shopping until half eight; went around most of London looking for an Air album; their latest one... They're returning to form. I've all their albums and its most interesting to chart their progress! It's the first band I really followed! __________________ [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC] 🏓

15th December 2012, 22:02	#5939
coolcat This is my second home Audi Q3 TDI S-Line Quattro Join Date: Jul 2007 Location: Clacton On Sea/On the boat somewhere Posts: 51,335 Thanks: 9,890 Thanked 12,235 Times in 8,232 Posts	Forgot to tell you, no update on cats as we're going tomorrow now instead __________________ Jeff.

15th December 2012, 16:00	#5932
COLVERT This is my second home R75 Saloon. Join Date: Feb 2009 Location: France/or Devon. Posts: 14,003 Thanks: 3,851 Thanked 2,167 Times in 1,816 Posts	For all you worried gents this might give you a laff.--------------- A bloke starts his new job at the zoo and is given three tasks. First is to clear the exotic fish pool of weeds. As he does this a huge fish jumps out and bites him. To show who is boss, he beats it to death with a spade. Realizing his employer won't be best pleased he disposes of the fish by feeding it to the lions, as lions will eat anything. Moving on to the second job of clearing out the Chimp house, he is attacked by the chimps that pelt him with coconuts. He swipes at two chimps with a spade killing them both. What can he do? Feed them to the lions, he says to himself, because lions eat anything... He hurls the corpses into the lion enclosure. He moves on to the last job which is to collect honey from the South American Bees. As soon as he starts he is attacked by the bees. He grabs the spade and smashes the bees to a pulp. By now he knows what to do and shovels them into the lions cage because lions eat anything. Later that day a new lion arrives at the zoo.. He wanders up to another lion and says "What's the food like here?" The lions say: "Absolutely brilliant, today we had Fish and Chimps with Mushy Bees. Colv.

15th December 2012, 22:03	#5940
coolcat This is my second home Audi Q3 TDI S-Line Quattro Join Date: Jul 2007 Location: Clacton On Sea/On the boat somewhere Posts: 51,335 Thanks: 9,890 Thanked 12,235 Times in 8,232 Posts	I've heard of the band Air supply but not Air, I'm guessing they're good as you have all their albums! __________________ Jeff.