A Nun goes to the airport...
 

A NUN WAS SITTING IN THE LOUNGE AT BIRMINGHAM AIRPORT , WAITING FOR HER FLIGHT TO DUBLIN .

SHE LOOKED OVER IN THE CORNER AND SAW ONE OF THOSE WEIGHT MACHINES THAT TELLS YOUR
FORTUNE AND THOUGHT TO HERSELF, 'I'LL GIVE IT A TRY AND SEE WHAT IT TELLS ME.'

SHE WENT OVER TO THE MACHINE, STEPPED UP ON THE SCALE AND PUT HER 50P IN ; OUT CAME A
CARD THAT READ, 'YOU ARE A NUN, YOU WEIGH 128LBS, AND YOU ARE GOING TO DUBLIN .'

THE NUN SAT BACK DOWN. SHE TOLD HERSELF THAT THE MACHINE PROBABLY GIVES THE SAME CARD
TO EVERYONE...
THE MORE SHE THOUGHT ABOUT IT THE MORE CURIOUS SHE GOT SO SHE DECIDED TO TRY IT AGAIN
SHE WENT BACK TO THE MACHINE AND AGAIN PUT HER 50P IN, AND OUTCAME A CARD THAT READ:

'YOU ARE A NUN, YOU WEIGH 128 LBS, YOU ARE GOING TO DUBLIN AND YOU ARE GOING TO
PLAY A FIDDLE.'
THE NUN SAYS TO HERSELF, 'I KNOW THAT IS WRONG, I HAVE NEVER PLAYED A MUSICAL INSTRUMENT EVEN
ONCE IN MY LIFE.' SHE SAT BACK DOWN.

FROM OUT OF NOWHERE A MUSICIAN CAME OVER AND SAT DOWN, PUTTING HIS FIDDLE CASE
ON THE SEAT BETWEEN THEM.
WITHOUT THINKING, SHE OPENED THE MUSICIAN'S CASE, TOOK OUT THE FIDDLE, AND STARTED
PLAYING BEAUTIFUL MUSIC.
SURPRISED AT WHAT SHE HAD DONE, SHE LOOKED OVER AT THE MACHINE, THINKING,
'THIS IS INCREDIBLE, I'VE GOT TO TRY THIS AGAIN.'

BACK TO THE MACHINE SHE WENT, PUT IN ANOTHER 50P, AND ANOTHER CARD CAME OUT. IT READ,
'YOU ARE A NUN, YOU WEIGH 128 LBS , YOU ARE GOING TO DUBLIN AND YOU ARE GOING TO
BREAK WIND.'
NOW SHE KNOWS THE MACHINE IS WRONG, AS SHE THOUGHT TO HERSELF, 'I'VE NEVER BROKEN
WIND IN PUBLIC A SINGLE TIME IN MY LIFE.' BUT GETTING DOWN OFF THE MACHINE SHE SLIPPED,
AND AS SHE WAS STRAINING TO KEEP HERSELF FROM FALLING TO THE FLOOR, SHE BROKE WIND.

ABSOLUTELY STUNNED, SHE SAT BACK DOWN AND LOOKED AT THE MACHINE. SHE SAID TO
HERSELF,
'THIS IS TRULY REMARKABLE. I'VE GOT TO TRY THIS AGAIN.'SHE WENT BACK TO THE MACHINE,
PUT IN ANOTHER 50P And ANOTHER CARD CAME OUT.

IT READ: 'YOU ARE A NUN, YOU WEIGH 128 LBS, YOU HAVE NOW FIDDLED AND F@RTED AROUND SO MUCH YOU’VE MISSED YOUR FLIGHT TO DUBLIN .'

Excellent Jay, love it :D:D:D:D.